Friday, January 8, 2010

completely off topic...



I know it’s a security precaution but seriously?

I am soooo OVER the “secret messages” I have to type just to send an email and this is why... I can’t do it! No lie, EVERY time one of those encrypted strands of random letters and numbers appears on my screen I have to hit the handicap button! By the way... does having a handicap button offend anyone... Perhaps those who are handicapped? I wanna know because it certainly offends me!

Just an impulsive thought I was having as I was sending emails this afternoon... thought I would put in the blog universe!

Wednesday, January 6, 2010

fufu...okay i did it!




Okay some of you who know me well might understand how "monumental" this post is for me... but for those of you who don't know me, let me explain myself (or perhaps defend my insanity).
I am not only a girl with "huge" and I mean "HUGE" food issues, but still haunting me in the back of my mind are childhood memories of restaurant tantrums and grocery store meltdowns all incidents having one underlying nucleus, FOOD...
One time, and I can recall this instance well, I was at a restaurant with my mom (God bless her soul...LOL) when the head chef decided to jazz up my order of plain butter noodles by adding a garnish of herbs... I think the waitress actually had to run for cover after she put the plate in front of me... I was eight!
Another time, and this was in high school, I was dating a boy who had so conveniently forgotten to mention to his mom that I was a vegetarian, she (his mom) had asked me to stay for dinner and I was cautious to accept, but knew it was kind of a lose lose situation if you know what I mean. Anyway, dinner was spaghetti which I thought would be safe because growing up in New York spaghetti meant meatballs and meatballs could be easily avoided... However, I was not in New York anymore, and meatballs are an uncommon phenomenon south of the Mason-Dixon Line. Let me just say I sat and ate meat infested spaghetti sauce for that boy! This was the beginning of many forced feedings... and rightly so, I have begun a long and exasperating battle against the fickle eater inside of me. Every mealtime she really wants to rear her capricious, troublesome, only-child nature, but I hold her back for the public safety and welfare of all humanity (okay sometimes I slip and she wins the battle, but we won't talk about that in public)!

My Christmas present to the Republic of Ghana (I hope she understands the mere significance of it all)... Eating fufu with light soup (and goat meat).

Happy New Year.... NO SMOKING!


I know, I know, I haven't posted anything new in a few weeks... I've been on "brain vacation"...Obviously so have these people... Happy New Year 2010!

Thursday, December 10, 2009

no title needed


"Love does not measure; it just gives."

(sounds a lot like Jesus' life... don't ya think?)



Sunday, November 29, 2009

hOmE...what does that really mean?



A tribute to home... Wandering around Washington D.C. with my stuffed animal dog (won from a claw vending machine in an Alabama gas station) in my purse (dog's name is Pav)...Washington Monument to my right, American flags billowing in the breeze!


Some say,

“Home is where the heart is”

... Others might agree, “Mi casa es su casa”

“Home is where you hang your hat”

“Home is where you can scratch where it itches”

“Home is not where you live, but where they understand you”

Many great poets, writers, theologians, and scholars have given their perspectives on what home means to them. The connotation of home is different for every person you ask... Perhaps home is different for every person. I think so.


You see, I have been living in West Africa for almost four months now and with the passing of Thanksgiving and the onset of Christmas I have begun to feel a yearning for home. After careful consideration of my own interpretation of home I have concluded,

“I don’t have an interpretation! I really don’t know what home means to me.”

In fact, just the other day someone asked me,

“Where do you call home?”

I looked that person in the eye and honestly told them,

“I’m not sure.”

Here I am a girl on the run who has been stopped in her tracks by the idea of “home”. So today’s question is,

“What is home?”

My family is scattered up and down the east coast of the United States, I am loved and welcomed into more homes than biologically required, yet I have no clear idea of where to call home.


My medical diagnosis is wanderlust (o.k. maybe not medically diagnosed...but you get the idea), ask anyone in my family, or better yet, ask my mom. For as long as I can recall I have had a spirit and sense of adventure. Not adventure in the sense of bungee jumping or rock climbing, but more like adventure in the sense of... I want to learn Spanish, I want to drive across the cross country, I want to live in Africa. Some might call this the “the travel bug” or just plain insanity, but to me this itching desire became my reality about two years ago when I made a decision to leave behind one life and stepped into another.


James says,

“You’re nothing but a wisp of fog. Catching a brief bit of sun before disappearing.”
Translation, LIFE IS SHORT. It is difficult to think about life as a vapor or wisp of fog when you are only twenty-four years old... but I know that James’ words are inspired and true. So I remind myself of his words as I live this vapor of a life.


I am definitely not quoting scripture to condone leaving one’s commitments. Impulsivity is not a good decision making tactic. I have learned through bad decision making that all decisions have their consequences, some are great, and some are guilt ridden. What I am trying to argue is my serious case of wanderlust.... I think you get the idea now.


So as I type this journal entry I am mentally evaluating my own thoughts about home and how “homesick” I am feeling (like I have written in the past, typing these messages is therapeutic).

How can someone miss something without specification. Can someone actually miss an idea? Humans beings miss each other, our family, our relationships, our pets, our routines, but can a human being actually miss an idea... a thought, a hope, a dream, a notion? My answer is,

“Undoubtably YES!”


“Sure, I miss Diet Coke, Target, and my Mom, but what I also miss is the idea of home, the place of my birth, the only place I have ever lived for twenty-four years... I miss my home!”


By human standards, I would say that homesickness is not uncommon. I mean, don’t we all feel an emptiness sometimes? A tinge to move, experience, or live outside of ourselves.


As a follower of Jesus, I would say that homesickness is unfailing. Here is why I make such a bold statement. As a believer in the divine and sacrificial life of Jesus Christ, I have pledged my life to follow His teachings and example, but Jesus did not only speak and teach about this life... in actuality He spoke more about His kingdom to come. To me this is the root of my homesickness. No matter where I travel or where I land, I will undoubtably feel a sense of homesickness. Think about it, the system on this earth we live in is broken, and until it is restored we will never feel at home. No matter where I am I will always be a visitor. My life can help make a difference, I can help in the restoration of this earth, but until He fully restores this world I and every other human living on this planet will be “homesick”. Right now our planet is a beautiful labyrinth of love, joy, pain, sorrow, and adventure...So just imagine how beautiful it will be when it has been made whole again, flawless, perfect! Sometimes I close my eyes to try to picture such a harmonious world...my imagination only touches the fringes of His reality.


Lord, Help me to play a part in Your restoration... Lead me through this “homesickness”. I want my life, although only a wisp of fog, to count for something!





Home...

Still wondering yourself? Here is what others think about the idea...


It matters less to a person where they are born then where they can live.

Turkish Proverb


Home is a place where, when you have to go there, they have to take you in.


We should come home from adventures, and perils, and discoveries every day with new experience and character.

Henry David Thoreau


Everyday is a journey, and the journey itself is home.

Matsuo Basho


Where thou art, that is home.

Emily Dickinson


We shape our dwellings, and afterwards our dwellings shape us.

Winston Churchill


Home is a place you grow up wanting to leave, and grow old wanting to get back to.

John Ed Pearce


One may make their house a palace of sham, or they can make it a home, a refuge. Mark Twain


I long, as does every human being, to be at home wherever I find myself.

Maya Angelo

Tuesday, November 10, 2009

Nakedness Tolerance


Naked Children... everywhere, Naked Adults... not uncommon, BUT absolutely under NO circumstances NAKED FIRE! 

Friday, November 6, 2009

all you need is love...











three months and counting... i have found that having faith like a child is the key to life... Lord, grant me faith like a child... i want to Live with faith... Laugh with faith...and especially LOVE with faith, like a child!